Becoming a Mother

What kind of mother will you be? Becoming a mother is an ongoing process. Each stage of  pregnancy and parenting provides an opportunity to examine your life, your childhood, your relationships, and your hopes or fears around this major life transition.

Maternal identity is fluid and evolves over time. Many moms note that their new identity becomes more grounded as they feel more secure as a mother caring for a baby or young toddler. Here are some questions to consider on your journey to motherhood:

  • Who will my baby be?
  • What are my fantasies or fears around the imagined baby?
  • How will I change as I become a mother?
  • What are my hopes around becoming a mother?  
  • How will my day to day life change as I become a mother?
  • What scares me about becoming a mother?
  • How will my relationship with my partner change?
  • What parts of my own mothering do I appreciate from my childhood?
  • What do I want to leave behind from the way I was parented?
  • How will my identity shift as I move from a daughter role to being a mother myself?
  • How will I reconcile my career identity changes?
  • How do I feel about the physical changes to my body?
  • Who can I turn to for support through all of these changes?

It can be helpful to explore your thoughts and feelings around pregnancy, postpartum and becoming a mother. Make space to consider these changes through journaling, talking it out with your partner or a friend, or meeting with a mental health professional who specializes in perinatal and postpartum health.